What Google Thinks About You

We've all ran to Google to get answers or search for random things. And you've probably seen those search suggestions right after you've typed a few words, and some are great, some just ridiculous. In this thread, the slogging community shares Google's thoughts on what they need to learn. Spoiler alert: some secrets may have been exposed.

This Slogging thread by Mónica Freitas, Jack Boreham, Teri Eyenike, Daniel Guzman and Sara Pinto occurred in slogging's official #fix-the-internet channel, and has been edited for readability.

We've all ran to Google, our old friend, to get answers or search for random things. And you've probably seen those search suggestions right after you've typed a few words, and some are great, some just ridiculous. So in this thread, I want to know your search engine's recommendations for when you type "How to." Share your most ridiculous suggestions!

I'm not sure why Google would think I need instructions on how to use a bidet or make coffee, but here we are! 😂

😂😂 Brilliant thread!

I don't even have a mac. Google thinks I need to lose weight but also make pancakes.

Tbh I'm thinking about getting rid of Instagram.

Don't worry I'm covid free 😂

I should check my result page and share my screenshot.

Hahahaha, I feel disappointed. My results are a reflection of my love for movies and series.

So... all very important questions that need to be asked haha. The reference to "How to train your dragon" and the covid one are the most accurate. But I should learn how to tie a tie! I don't even know what to say about the bidet one... 😂

I think what is on my mind is how to make money and get comfortable in life 😂

Jack Boreham, Google wants to give you body image issues! Nasty!

Jack Boreham, giving up on Insta? Been there! Why though?

Daniel Guzman, yours is a mix of movies, songs, and very productive suggestions. I'll remove myself from this conversation, as I only have instructions on bidets to offer 😂

Sara Pinto, so we're all struggling with covid and thinking about giving up on Instagram ... interesting, ahahaha. I'm taking the bidet one to heart as it seems it was just for me 😂

Teri Eyenike, another productive fellow! Let us know if you find a way to make money quickly 😂

It will be a gradual process, Mónica Freitas. I got some money writing technical content some 2 months ago, but I want more opportunities coming my way.

Teri Eyenike, what areas do you usually write about?

Mónica Freitas, we are all the same person at core 😂

Mónica Freitas, I think it's just rubbish. It's difficult to promote my stuff on there, and I find it awkward to use. It's great for pics but I'm not a big let's take a picture person...

I write topics on JavaScript, React, Next, Cloudinary. And I write as a ghostwriter at https://hackmamba.io

Sara Pinto, living the same life, different bodies 😂

Jack Boreham, why not design posts related to what you do and use them in your feed? That way, you don't get that awkward feeling for posting selfies.

Teri Eyenike, that's amazing! So quite specific topics. Is it hard to continuously find topics to write in technical content?

My boss handles topic suggestions and assigns them to us in the group. I then research the subject, write the code on the topic, and finally write on the subject matter.

Teri Eyenike, oh, okay, so it's a bit easier that way, as you already have a "guideline."